Friday, May 28, 2010

NO NO Friday

Remember how I told you earlier that my parent's tried to poison me at a young age and my mom got all "OHMYGOSHOHMYGOSH" and made my dad get rid of all the poisonous plants?
Well. I thought after that I was home free on the patio.
Listen up pups, there are THORNS on those roses. THORNS, I tell you. As in ... hurt your tongue really bad when you chew on the stem really REALLY prickly designed to sever your tongue barnacle things.
Just stay away.
Sign me,
Little D, learning lessons the hard way (again.)

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Diary of a Wimpy Dog

Allow me to introduce THE SHARK.
Remember that newspaper article from a few days ago?
I thought after that I might have to name my blog "Diary of Wimpy Dog."
Bad press that was.
The feedback from that one jolted me out of my (according to my mom at least) seemingly perpetual adolesence.
Yes, folks.
I have befriended THE SHARK.
Sign me,
Litte D, manning up

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Little Runaway

I've always wondered what it would be like to roam free on the other side of the gate.
And then it happened.
I ran right through my mom's legs as she opened the gate to go get the mail.
I made it about 6 feet before we all froze: me, free on the grass; Mom, frozen three steps away from the gate; dad, on the patio with the hose spraying in his hand.
Mom reacted first. She foolishly assumed that my manners would kick in when I escaped and said "Sit, Duncan" and "Come, Duncan."
I laughed, but went no further afield.
Dad, the more practical of my parents, yelled "Hey Duncan, want a treat?"
I beat a hasty return to the patio and was rewarded with a treat.
And a little talking to.
Sign me,
Little D, Escapee

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Friday, May 21, 2010

Introducing "NO NO FRIDAY"

My mom is reading a book called "The Essential West Highland White Terrier" published by Wiley Publishing. In this book it says "The Westie is mischievous, spunky, affectionate, devoted, and extremely smart."

Being that my superior smartness is published fact, I feel legitimately qualified to share with you some definite doggy NO NO's.

I know what you're thinking.


I can just hear your sassy puppy voice saying "If he is so smart then why is he getting grounded practically every weekend."

Well, helloooooo.

Did you not read that whole quote up there??

I am MISCHIEVOUS as well as SMART.

Can't hardly help myself.

Anywoof .....

Allow me to introduce "NO NO FRIDAY," a Friday only series (despite your thoughts to the contrary, I don't get in trouble enough to post a "NO NO" every day of the week) where I will share learning lessons for all you pups and pupettes out there.

And, perhaps I will share a "NO NO" post every now and then for you people types too.

We'll see.

The first NO NO is DO NOT CHEW YOUR MOM'S SHOES. And, most importantly, DO NOT CHEW THEM WITH HER FEET IN THEM. Bad idea, really bad idea.

Sign me,

Little D, most likely off to the doghouse for the weekend again
P.S. Mom, you could really use a pedicure, by the way.
Editor's Note:
Dear Duncan,
When you quit biting my toes, I will get a pedicure.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

What a night!

Well, hello there ladies ....

You know who you are.

Wink. Wink.

Thank you so much for coming to my party last night.

We really rocked it, didn't we!

After you left, I totally crashed.

Mom LOVED that and said you ladies could come back any time.

One bit of advice though ... when mom is not looking it is a GOOD THING to feed me table scraps, despite what she says.

Oh, and, a little champagne never really hurt a pup, did it?

Sign me,

Little D, Life of the Party

Editor's Note:

Dear Duncan,

No drinking until you are 18.



Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Why didn't I think of that?

Well call me shocked.

You know those Windows 7 commercials (not that I hang out watching tv all day or anything) where the dude is on there saying " blah blah blah and it was my idea?"


I have just started taking a bunch of photos (see above) for a series called "From a Dog's Perspective" and now I have discovered this. Yes, now you can buy a webcam for your dog to wear so you can see the day from his perspective.



I hate it when someone gets to a good idea before I do!!!!

Sign me,

Little D, on to the next idea ....

Monday, May 17, 2010

Different Viewpoints

Suddenly my mom is getting lots of "Bark Control" spam in her inbox.
It is spam, right?
Surely no one out there would complain about moi, right??
Pup Fact: Westies, as a breed, cannot process the word "yappy." On the contrary, we fancy ourselves rather erudite (big word alert!) and pithy.
Enough said.
Sign me,
Little D, smooth talker

Thursday, May 13, 2010

A little imperfection

Well, wooooooof, wooooooof!
I'll be darned.
I just realized my ears don't match.
There I was thinking that once it popped up it would be just like the other one.
Oh, well. Mom says it makes me look a little "rough and tumbled" and that all the girls like that.
(Insert attempt at sexy grrrrrrr here.)
Sign me,
Little D, loving the imperfections!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

What was I thinking?

Oh, boy.

What was I thinking???????



I WASN'T thinking.

Warning to all pups: do NOT, do NOT, do NOT eat your goopy toys in your mom's favorite slippers. Her favorite slippers that dad gave her on a special occasion. Her favorite slippers that dad gave her on a special occasion that were very expensive.

Bad idea.

Very bad idea.

Sign me,

Little D, gonna do better next time!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

HURRY to the store

Listen up pups ... you gotta get you one of these.

Really, do whatever it takes.

Most. Goopy. Treat. Ever.

Bark, howl, pee on the floor, hop in the car, mapquest Petco.



Just do it.


Sign me,

Little D, you're gonna thank me

Monday, May 10, 2010

Mother's Day Update

Listen up pups and pupettes ... when it's Mother's Day, you just gotta let it roll.
For instance, I let my mom take this flowery picture of me on the long Mother's Day walk I took her on. And, (nervous yawn) I let her say "tooter tooter ain't no westie cuter" all day long, and even one time IN PUBLIC.
And another thing ... a long walk in the park is a good start, but it doesn't mean poop if there is no flower delivery. Keyword here is DELIVERY. DELIVERY people. There is nothing more likely to get an excitement pee out of a mom than opening the door and having a floral bouquet handed to her. Plus, hello, we can't drive.
Second point about flowers is THE NOTE. It MUST be heartfelt. Goopy, pups, goopy. Words that must be included: best, fabulous, beautiful, LOVE LOVE LOVE, and "you rock."
Personally, I also included a list of a few things that would make her a better mother in the coming year. Careful here, pupsters, this can come off as a little self-serving.
Sign me,
Little D, son of the most beautiful, fabulous, best mom who I love so dearly and who totally rocks.

Friday, May 7, 2010

A Mother's Day Tribute

In honor of mother's day, I am considering getting a tatoo.

Surely she won't ground me if it's in her honor. Right??

Sign me,

Little D, Mama's Boy

Thursday, May 6, 2010



The top was down and we were cruising.

It was my first real road trip.

Best part: trying to bite the wind and catch it with my paws. I chomped and chomped and swatted and swatted. Mom said if she'd have caught it on tape we'd for sure have won $10,000.

Second best: Chicks were soooo checking me out.

Smile on my dad's face: Priceless

Sign me,

Little D, Big Cruiser

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Weekend, Part II

And then I jumped into the pool.

My flaps were down and I was airborne.

It was cold.

I was fearless.

Spectators were so impressed it was suggested I become a cliff diver in Mexico.

I'm holding out for the 2012 Olympics.

Sign me,

Little D, Olympic Hopeful

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Over the weekend ...

I had the best playdate EVER!!!

Allow me to introduce my new friends Bart and Bradley.

They are the best mentors a pup could have.

On Sunday they took me for a LONG, LONG walk.

They introduced me to some friends of theirs.

They took me out to lunch.

And then we went back to their house and things got really fun.

We ran around and then ...

Tune in tomorrow for Part II of "As The Dogs Play."

Monday, May 3, 2010

More about the gift bag

Ok Pups,

Know this.

Gifts are great, but it's THE BAG that counts.

Above, clockwise (had to stare at the clock for HOURS to figure that one out!): gift delivery, of course; tissue paper delivery; tug-of-war partner; and, comfy place to settle down with your chewy.

Warning: Do not, DO NOT show your disregard for the actual gift to your people.

Bad idea.

Discourages gifting.

Sign me,

Little D, knowing all the tricks