Friday, December 12, 2014

Fool Me Once ....

Dear Santa,

I am a ball guy.  I know you probably already knew that and all, but just in case my mom tries to sub out my letter to you with one that she actually wrote, I just wanted to say it again.  I am a ball guy. 

And, yes, my favorite ball is a green one.  But it is NOT this green one:

The other day mom and I were playing ball and all of a sudden she tried to pull a fast one on me.  She said it was to improve my health.  She was hoping I would bite into it and love it. But, pfffftttt, NO.  I did not like it.  It was tangy and crunchy, not slimey and perfectly seasoned with saliva and dirt from the floor. 
No disrespect to the healthy eaters of the world, but an APPLE is a fruit serving and NOT A BALL under any circumstances, by any stretch of the imagination.

So thank you Santa, for listening.  And for ignoring any letters you might receive from me requesting fruit in my stocking.  Because that would be a fraudulent conveyance of my wishes by my mom.  And that would be naughty on her part, so go ahead and put the fruit in HER stocking if you would.

Respectfully submitted,


  1. Duncan we so agree with you. an apple is not a ball and all fruits are devil foods. Have a fabulous Friday.
    Best wishes Molly

  2. Thank goodness you discovered the potential Santy Paws Letter substitution before it was too late. Could have been a disaster Christmas Day otherwise !
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

  3. But Duncan a ball you can eat, what could possibly be nicer?
    Toodle pip!
    Bertie (who adores his daily apple core, which he gets after Gail has eaten the rest).

  4. my mom tried that too to give me an apple instead of a ball... but I smelled it immediately and ignored that thingy :o)
    Easy Rider

  5. Dory totally agrees, plus it is green...and how could anything green taste good??? Us boys like apples, and green beans tho!!
    Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bilbo

  6. Apples are delicious! If you don't like them raw, then tell your human to cut it into thin slices and put it into a pie for you!

  7. YES SANTA PAWS.... FILL HER Stocking with those FAKE green "Balls" of fruit.

  8. Yeah, we're not fruit dogs. We think that was a mean trick AND we think Frankie and Ernie have the right idea.

  9. GREEN BALLS??! Are you sure you shouldn't be seein' a vettie for that??? BOL!!!! OMD, I crack myself up....
    Seriously, that is indeed fraudulent!!! I sure hopes that YOUR letter cancels out HER letter to Santy Paws!
    The only acceptable GREEN foodable is margaritas!!!!! ☺
    Ruby ♥

  10. Duncan why I love apples. If Santa leaves you apples well ship them to me. Why good things come in green like green grass. Maybe you just need to think out of the box.
    Thanks for stopping by my blog
    Sweet William The Scot

  11. I am a ball guy too. We gotta support each other on this!

    Your Pals,

    Murphy & Stanley

  12. Oh Duncan I love adore love adore fact sometimes I get in a big ole tizzy fit if mom is not quick enuf cutting them up in my bowl....Maggie pukes them up tho and so does gussie that leaves more for me.
    stella rose

  13. Tryin to trick ya wif an apple?? What da woof?

  14. Mitch will take the apple but I'm with you, Duncan - tennis balls rule!

    Love ya lots♥

  15. Good one Duncan....betcha Santa is not pleased with Mom.....No Me I would have had a couple of bites, then hit the rest for later.

    The Mad Scots

  16. We don't like apples, green or red. But we enjoy chasing oranges around the house and making them squirt orange juice!

    Braeden, Seth and Riley

  17. Stay on your toes, Duncan,,,we always have to try to be one tricky move ahead of them.

  18. I do like apples a lot, but they are not balls, that is for sure.

    Loveys Sasha

  19. Good thing you cleared that up! Who knows what crazy stuff you would be getting on Christmas!